Ancient Grains Archive
Three Dog Night, You Are A Terrible Party Guest
Ancient Grains, Humor
Oct 04, 2013
Hi, Three Dog Night. How's it going? Want some -- no, sorry. Sorry. I forgot. Look, I've heard you've been talking a lot lately about the party last Saturday and I'm really sorry to hear that you didn't have a good time. I really am. I just wish you'd come to me
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When We Wore Foundation Garments
Ancient Grains, Feminism
Oct 04, 2013
Previously from Mary J. Breen: My Sexual Education.
When I was a child in the ’50s, one of our favourite card games was Old Maid, the one in which the person with the lone unmatchable card—The Old Maid—is the loser. By age eight, I’d figured out that nobody in real life wanted
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She Said, She Said: Advice About Death and Halloween
Advice, Ancient Grains
Oct 04, 2013
Previous installments of The Toast’s advice column from two disparate and imperfect persons can be found here. Last time: Nails and Aisle-Walking.
Hi! I have a bit of a time-sensitive question, but no pressure! It's also probably easy, if that helps?
My next-door neighbor's husband died two days ago, in a horrific
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Adopting a Child in America: What “Baby Veronica” Teaches Us About the Adoption Process
Ancient Grains, Politics
Oct 04, 2013
Previously: Veronica Brown and the Indian Child Welfare Act.
Though she is now a walking, talking preschooler, the headline read, "Baby Veronica Handed Over to Adoptive Parents."
On the night of Monday September 23, 2013, Veronica Brown was removed from the care of her biological father and transferred
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Bad Recipes. Bad.
Ancient Grains, Food
Oct 04, 2013
Anyone can screw up while cooking. You forget the salt. You forget to turn it down to a simmer. You don't read the recipe all the way through, and then you suddenly need a gratin dish or something. It's okay, no big. That's on you, you're an idiot, you move on with
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Guerrilla Marketing Campaign for an Underground Album Release
Ancient Grains, Music
Oct 03, 2013
Three months before release: Affix blurry, incomprehensible band posters to bus shelter ceilings across the city. Some posters will feature a tiny QR code in one corner. When scanned by a smartphone, the code brings up a website containing three riddles about the band. Solve all three, and that night a brick
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Step Out Of The Car, Please: One For The Road
Ancient Grains, Weird True Tales
Oct 03, 2013
Previous entries in the series can be found here.
The sound of the tires exploding, the bottom of the car bouncing along the shoulder of the road, the screeching sound that comes with a vehicle out of control: none of that was enough to bring me out of my blackout. My car
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Feel the Burn: Down Time
Ancient Grains, Fitness
Oct 03, 2013
Previous installments of “Feel the Burn” can be found here.
Let's talk a little bit about when you're not exercising. Maybe that's today! Maybe it's been a few weeks. Maybe forever. I, personally, am really in thrall to the idea of systems and resolutions and I'll-get-in-there-four-days-a-week and by-May-I-should-be-doing-five-pull-ups and things like that,
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