They don't have to be celebrity memoirs, and in fact more often than not I'd prefer they not be. The best trashy memoir is petty and willing to dish about everything – if they don't name names, they let you fill in the blanks easily enough – and tells you things you
want
to believe are true, even if they can't possibly be.
Alexander Hamilton was an important figure in American history for many reasons. He was America’s first Secretary of the Treasury, founded the New York Post, and together with his friend and rival Aaron Burr invented rap in 1776.
Feel free to add your own to the list. The important distinction here is that none of these can be
intentionally
condescending – none of your Shortstops, your Kiddos, your Sweethearts, nothing obviously diminutive or that calls out the uneven nature of your relationship.
Their Style:
Georg favors a seafaring aesthetic inspired by rigid discipline, uniforms, and a lot of marching. He likes rooms to conduct themselves with the utmost order and decorum. I enjoy large fountains, tree-lined streets, extravagant home puppet theaters, and statues that remind me of the Reverend Mother’s chiseled cheekbones.
He's so hard to shop for! He's just
so
hard to shop for! He is just so
hard
to
shop
for! Aren't men just the hardest to shop for? What can you buy a man? A handful of dust, and
nothing
.
We want to be able to count the seven gables, walk through the Sleepy Hollow Cemetery, locate the port that Captain Ahab sailed from, and verify whether the author got it right, whether the storyworld resembles our own.
hi my names Carmilla I fell down outside your house
can i live here for a while
nothing gay will happen i promise
what
oh my god you are so beautiful
oh, thank you
who are you?
thank you so much for letting me stay here
i'll just tell my mom to go ahead without me
where is she going
haha
