you seem distracted, my love
do i really
you keep staring into the middle distance
oh
is that not you?
i'm always mixing up you with the middle distance
you look so much like the middle distance

"I'll count the hours that you're away. Not on the lips. I'm going to that party at Nina's later, I don't want to smear my lipstick."

In no particular order, and don't get cocky. I'm just giving credit where credit is due.

Heterosexuality In Action

Women only love men with CROOKED SMILES, a man who smiles with his mouth all in a straight line might as well be DEAD; a male smile should resemble nothing on earth so much as the Leaning Tower of Pisa, Lombard Street, a lightning bolt, a scarecrow with a broken neck, or two palm trees leaning against each other to form a big "X"

Nick Jonas, Nick Jonas

Grease

Any and all KISS songs that refer to specific fabrics a woman is wearing (usually "leather and lace" or "silk and satin")

The entire Twilight series (movies only)

Whatever it is that Russell Brand does