This is a turtle qua turtle. Look, we can’t just…not talk about it. That’s the coward’s way out. If you hadn’t seen a turtle’s penis, which you might well not have, I bet you would think it was sort of average looking, and scalish, and nondescript. And, you know, God in heaven, I wish you’d be right. But you aren’t. And you have to know this. And you have to see this, and we have to talk about it. Because I had to see it once, and I don’t know how to go through this alone.
Anyhow, here’s a video of a turtle having sex with a rollerblade.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=089srEZ2OGM
It’s unbearable to begin with, right, all lurid and livid-colored and wretched, and then at about the :22 mark, it…there’s no better word for it, disgorges further of itself. Penis begets more penis; additional penis is vomited forth from the depths of the penis, and a sort of sickly manta-ray-like beast begins swaying from the turtle’s loins.
That’s what a turtle’s penis looks like. I just thought that you should know.
