#1 Mom Pendant, $40.99 (was $114.99) Here’s what I got myself for Mother’s Day. My kid isn’t old enough to buy me anything — although Sonia at daycare made her hand me a cupcake-shaped foil balloon today with the words “Sweet Mom” scrawled across the bottom; the obvious mischaracterization being the main clue that this gift wasn’t selected for me by my daughter. Still made me cry. Look what else I found. Happy Mother’s Day. Moving on!

Superga Sneakers, $49.99 (were $119) These are on sale because they contain secret GLITTER. You have to squint to see it.

Derek Lam Flora Trousers, $118.50 (were $395) Getting way into kind of ugly clothes lately. I figure if I’m going to look like shit all the time anyway, might as well amuse myself, right? But, okay, so you have no sense of humor AND really love flower prints. Here you go:

AX Paries Shirt Dress, $49 (was $83) While your’e at it, belt it:

Belt with Whip Stitch Detail, $14 (was $24) Just a tidge dom.

Foliage Bloom Pillow Cover, $49.99 (was $99) At first, I hated this pillowcase. Now I love it. I’m actually impressed by the power of this pillowcase to change (at least!) one heart and one mind. This pillowcase might as well run for president.

Wood Burning Kit, $19.99 (was $42) Hide your furniture!

Smashbox Pout Collection, $29 (was $45; $85 value) The reviews for this are all like, “This looked like it would suck. I bought it anyway and it’s perfect!” Here’s to risk takers.

A Fork, $860 (was $1,070) A fork.