Every line of this is horrifyingly cringe-inducing, but this –
this
, beloveds – if you are ever considering putting on a blonde wig and flying to your ex-fiancé's house, please call me first, and I will take you out for...for literally anything. Anything else.
Aspects of Modern Oxford, by a mere don
A. D. Godley, 1894
Kids Today Want Trophies For Everything
"The undergraduate who has made a speech at the Union, or a century for his college second eleven, wants a printed certificate of his glorious achievements."
Anya came home to an apartment that smelled the way it always did when her mom was gone—a little sweet, a little organic. Her mother was up north with a tourist group. She was a translator; whenever she left, there was less music, less cigarette smoke, less warm food in the apartment. The afternoons passed soundlessly into night.
It is 1925, and change is coming to Downton. No one who watched Sunday night’s episode could possibly have missed this point. Repeated by numerous characters, it was underscored by the rumors of impending staff reductions at the Abbey -- and even more by the auction held at a neighboring manor house, Mallerton, after its owners have been forced to sell.
She probably meant no offense; she just forgot her manners or, more likely, slipped and gave voice to the truth she believes, the truth that lives in her head. Unlike her, I didn't have the luxury of forgetting myself or my place.
1
. Because the glass escalator apparently also applies to gay music, I guess.
2
. There's a pervasive alt-dyke juvenile-butch-delinquent atmosphere that's apparent from the first shot that I can't quite define, but I know it when I see it.
You need an ever present audience to appreciate such monologues as "Where Did All My Money Go Why Did I Spend It All On This Library" and "Oh God I'm In So Much Debt How Will I Crawl Out of This Debt." Inanimate statues will do for yelling ideas like, "I'll sell everything else—everything else," alone in your library. The best statues look noble, brooding, or listening.
ICY BLONDE WOMAN
[
weighted down with diamonds
]: I'm awfully nervous, John
A PSYCHIATRIST
: You're absolutely crazy, Madeline. The specific nature of your madness has long been of interest to men of science. Allow me to deliver a thirty-minute lecture directly to the camera in front of the blackboard on the subject. [
He does so
.]