We live in an age of worry — things are falling apart, hell is other people, you’re wasting your life — and it can seem like nobody understands your particular flavor of agony. Until now! Whatever your existential dilemma, at DIAL-A-MODERNIST, we’ve got an answer for your every despair.

Dear Modernist,

I work at a high-powered consulting firm in Manhattan and I feel totally guilty about loving my job! I just want to live and wear great suits and sync calendars! But should I put my career on hold to have a love life? I have this terrible feeling I’m going to wake up one day and want kids, and it’ll be too late, but I just don’t right now — is that a bad thing?

–Birkin, Not Babies

Dear Miss B,

It is enough to have this day! the occasional red Starbucks holiday still flashing from the sea of white grandes; high-pitched click of your glossy heels on the cement; laptop buzzing in your great leather bag; sunglasses tinted into the sidewalk; glossy black windows; the spine-tingling jingle of some stranger’s iPhone marimba; life; Manhattan; this moment in January.

–V. Woolf

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