Previously: How to talk to babies about Marxist theory.
BABY: read dog book
ME: are you ready to find the antecedent
BABY: [holds out book] dog book
ME: okay are you encoding or decoding right now
ground yourself in context before looking for meaning
BABY: [waves book]
ME: thats right
find your spacetime coordinate
ME: [jingles keys]
BABY: [gurgles happily]
ME: okay baby
what are you laughing at
[jingles keys]
are you laughing at the signifier or the signified
Previously: How to talk to babies about gender theory.
BABY: want book
ME: that is the rankest consumerism
BABY: book
ME: oh you want to be a subject?
you want to just be a subject that consumes blindly?
BABY: book
ME: sure
fine
you realize you’re resisting literally nothing right now
BABY: want green book
BABY: [sleeps]
ME: HAVE YOU QUESTIONED ANYTHING ABOUT THE DRIVE TO ACCUMULATE CAPITAL TODAY
BABY: [sleeps]
ME: no of course not
you just CONSUMED and PASSED OUT
like a plutocrat
BABY: [sleeps]
