Deeply Important Videos To Watch Today

You’ve seen it thirteen times thirteen times, but that doesn’t matter; it’s Halloween tradition. It’s what got Tracy the key to the city of Gary, Indiana, and it still holds the key to your heart: the full-length version of Werewolf Bar Mitzvah.

Twin Peaks

I have seen exactly three distinct parts of Twin Peaks: the pilot episode (three times), the scene where BOB climbs over the couch (more times than I can count), and the final moments, where Dale Cooper (I think) turns into BOB, or is possessed by BOB, or something. I could not tell you anything else that happens on Twin Peaks. It’s a great scene, though.

Boy Meets World, “And Then There Was Shawn,” Parts II and III (Part I has been tragically removed for copyright violation).

This is a much better Halloween episode than the one where D.J. Tanner plays a witch, in part because this was filmed around 1998, when roughly 90% of the cast was just lips and hair. It’s also profoundly accurate about a particular type of adolescent experience — Shawn fantasizes about murdering everybody that he knows because two of his friends have stopped dating.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YXZ0mxj4k-0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OYFqK1Tqsiw

Night of the Hunter, “Right Hand, Left Hand”

“You see these fingers, dear hearts? These fingers has veins that run straight to the soul of man. The right hand, friends, the hand of love.”

My parents saw this movie together on one of their first dates; after he dropped her off at home, my father called my mother late in the night and quietly sang “Leeeeeaning…leeeeeaning…safe and secure from all alarm…leeeeeeeaning…leeeeeeeeeaning …leeeeeaning on the everlasting arms,” because my father is a monster.

Peter Lorre Gets a Call From a Fan

“Yeah, this is Peter Lorre.” All trailers should begin with the star of the movie smoking at home, answering phone calls from strangers and explaining the plot in detail while a dog lays at their feet.

The Ending to “I Am A Fugitive From A Chain Gang”

Don’t watch it unless you’ve already seen it or don’t mind spoilers, I suppose, but it’s chilling and awful and shocking and fantastic. The footsteps in the dark! Where will you go? What will you do?

Mitchell and Webb, “Rebecca”

It’s perfect. It’s all perfect. It’s always been perfect.

“You won’t be able to hold a candle to her, I shouldn’t think.”

The Butterfly That Stamped 

Not quite as scary as the others, but still lovely and haunting to watch. Rated M for minor gender essentialism and Kipling-based whiffs of colonialism.

Shadow of the Vampire, “I’ll Eat Her Later”

John Malkovich yelling in a cave. Willem Defoe as Max von Schreck, a real-life vampire pretending to be a vampire for a film; Eddie Izzard as a hammy silent film star. It starts out with the two of them arguing over which members of the crew Defoe is allowed to eat, but pretty quickly devolves into a quarrel over whether or not they should shoot any scenes on the script. “How is your character supposed to get to Bremen?…I will not give you any close-ups!”

Tags: boy meets world, giving the people what they want, halloween, just so stories, videos, werewolf bar mitzvah