"We head live to Skylizabeth Michaels at the Dempublican National Convention."

You’re probably wondering how I got this body working in accounting, right? It’s a very common question, no need to be embarrassed.

Let me tell you about my standing desk.

You want to wear SOCKS? For your widdle feet?

Hello there! It's me again, critical darling and flawless director Paul Verhoeven. Every movie I make is perfect, yes, thank you for noticing! I was at my weekly canasta game with Luc Besson and John Woo, and we were all relating to each other the sort of things we like to yell at our actors while the camera rolls.

Think you don't have them? Wrong.

I did some extremely deep digging on the website all the teens are using and I’m here to report back the COOL fandoms to be a member of, as of 8/5/2015, 2:00 PM EST

Hello, Internet Readers! By now, you must have read about The Thing in the news or at least heard about The Thing. You might have some thoughts about The Thing. I certainly do! Here they are. If you are not familiar with the thing, good! Stay here and read my take on the The Thing, which is very important. My take, that is.

Jaya and I went through this week’s comments and pulled out some of our favorites. Just like everything else in life, this is highly subjective.

There’s a lot of stuff about “personality type” going around! I have not bothered to look at what any of them mean, until now! What I found is really surprising.

Ever find yourself thinking about how small you are, compared to the rest of the universe? Here are some solutions. I am an expert.

Here are the 20 Best Pokémon. Original 151, duh. I will brook no arguments.
All comments will be deleted.

Here are the new rules for America. Sorry! You made a cartoonist the king. I can't draw these things and now they're dead to me.

1. Write a letter to yourself every day about how much you hate that guy Brian at work. Read it aloud to him.

Jaya and I went through this week’s comments and pulled out some of our favorites. Just like everything else in life, this is highly subjective.

Unless you got picked, then life is a meritocracy and you can leave work early.

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you have a REALLY STRONG AND IMPORTANT opinion regarding something that doesn’t concern you in the slightest? I'm here for you.