Ancient Grains Archive
Getting Pancakes With Dan Savage
Ancient Grains, Sex
Dec 18, 2013
In eleventh grade, I got pancakes with Dan Savage at a Perkins in Berea, Ohio. He was in town to give a talk at Baldwin Wallace College about sex education, and to answer undergraduates' questions in his patented wry, sardonic way.
This was before the days of the Savage Love Podcast, before his
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Why Is Tom Hiddleston Also Johnny Weir and Rufus Wainwright?
Ancient Grains, Ghosts
Dec 18, 2013
Previously: Why Aren’t We Talking About How Much Tim Curry and Dave Grohl Are The Same?
I am horrified and astonished that Johnny Weir and Tom Hiddleston have been running around existing for the last several decades without a single attempt to force them to pair skate together à la Stranz and Fairchild
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Link Roundup!
Ancient Grains, The Internet
Dec 18, 2013
I'm in North Carolina for my brother's wedding, and I almost missed my flight because my cab never came (in Utah! You can't just FLAG ONE DOWN HERE, at 5:30am) and I was reminded that a friend of ours says the optimum number of flights to miss in your lifetime cannot be
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It Is Impossible For Me To Determine Whether Or Not You Have Been Offended
Ancient Grains, Humor
Dec 17, 2013
I would like to take this opportunity to apologize if you were offended by my recent behavior. Sadly, there is no way to determine whether you have in fact been offended at this time, as the science just isn't there yet. We may never know if you were offended or not --
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Why I Am Not Coming In To Work Today
Ancient Grains, Work
Dec 17, 2013
Dear employers,
I will have to take the day off today because:
☐ It's December and the streets are papier-mached with wet bronze leaves and it's so dark outside that the cars have their headlights on at 3pm
☐ I have recently been through a breakup, or I have been through a breakup at any
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Thoughts On Identity From A Formerly Self-Hating Black Chick
Ancient Grains, Writing
Dec 17, 2013
This post is brought to you by a generous reader.
Growing up, my blackness -- or perceived lack thereof -- was always a matter of discussion. From a very young age I remember being told that my speech, mannerisms, and my interests were not black enough. I was considered an “Oreo,” black on the outside,
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My Suburban Fantasy
Ancient Grains, Writing
Dec 17, 2013
I think I can remember the first time I swam in the ocean. I can definitely remember my first concert (Prince—great) and my first French kiss (back of a school bus in the seventh grade—not so great). If pressed, I can call to mind my first roller coaster ride and the first
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Sir David Attenborough, My Secular Saint
Ancient Grains, The Great Outdoors
Dec 17, 2013
Laura Passin's past work for The Toast has included The Day I Should Have Believed in God, and a celebration of the poet Muriel Rukeyser.
One day, Sir David Attenborough will die. You might know Sir David, or at least you might know his voice: he's the posh British man ...Read More