Ancient Grains Archive
It’s a Dad Dad Dad Dad World: The American President
Ancient Grains, Movies
Aug 21, 2013
DADS--what a bunch of goofballs, at least in contemporary narratives. If a dad isn’t a doofus, then he’s terrible with that terribleness compounded because he plays against the audience’s built-in expectations of dads portrayed as kind, well-meaning people who don’t quite understand the creatures they spawned but support them all the same.
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Things That Are Universally Liked Within a Very Particular Demographic
Ancient Grains, Dreams
Aug 21, 2013
1. Allison Janney's performance as C.J. Cregg on The West Wing.
2. Using the Boer War as a metaphor for things that are really, really old.
3. Informing someone that "flaccid" used to be pronounced "flak-sid," but "flass-id" DOES sound more appropriate given the image it creates.
4. When you are six minutes away from
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It’s Not My Fault! Your Guide to Defensive Feminism
Ancient Grains, Feminism
Aug 20, 2013
It has been a pretty rad week on Twitter for addressing some of the issues with non-intersectional mainstream feminism. If you haven’t seen the #solidarityisforwhitewomen hashtag started by @karynthia that's been trending on Twitter the whole world over, you ...Read More
“The Last Acceptable Prejudice”
Ancient Grains, The Internet
Aug 20, 2013
I was compiling an amusing listicle of groups believed to be the targets of the "last acceptable prejudice" (Catholics, Christians who may or may not be Catholics, gingers,
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Meet Maria
Ancient Grains, Meta
Aug 20, 2013
Call off the search! Call off the dogs! Call off the searching dogs. She has been found. The Toast has acquired its first helpmeet, and her name pulses with strange and crystalline energies. She is Maria, and she is our third heat.
She does not live
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The Quotable Jane Austen for Evil People: Sense and Sensibility Edition
Ancient Grains, Books
Aug 20, 2013
When your partner worries about the declining health of his beloved parents whom you grudgingly help support:
"If you observe, people always live for ever when there is an annuity to be paid them."
When criticized for underpaying interns:
"Five hundred a year! I am sure I cannot imagine how they
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Who Is The Most Dead Girl In Indie Rock?
Ancient Grains, Music
Aug 20, 2013
Previously in this series: Who is the saddest girl?
If there is one thing the current crop of indie rocker neo-stompist lumber-throwback-jacks loves to do, it's sing about dead women. Not just any women: historical dead women, and the deader the better, whether they fling themselves off of a lighthouse or a
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How To Start a Girl Gang
Ancient Grains, Movies
Aug 20, 2013
It was a decade ago that Lauren and I got matching tattoos, three-inch flames on the inside of our right biceps. The guy who did them was stocky, cranky and wearing a leather vest. In the next chair, a girl no older than us was wincing tearfully as she got her boyfriend's
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