Ancient Grains Archive
Official Toast Stances: Volume Two
Ancient Grains, Business
Nov 05, 2013
If you do not like the things we approve of, we suggest you revisit your stance. You are still allowed to like and/or engage in the things we dis-approve of, you are just wrong. Previous installments can be found here. - Eds.
The Toast Approves of the Following Things:
1. Target.
2. Hiding multiple
...Read More
Peter Lorre’s Daughter and the Hillside Strangler
Ancient Grains, Weird True Tales
Nov 04, 2013
"I Had a Brush With a Serial Killer" is a well-respected entry in the short story form; Jay Roberts wrote quite a good one about his afternoon encounter with Randy Kraft back in the early 1980s, Chuck Klosterman wrote a
...Read More
Nicole and Mallory in California
Ancient Grains, Meta
Nov 04, 2013
From left to right: Nicole Cliffe, Baby Cliffe, Self, Sister of Self Laura Ortberg Turner (colloquially known as The Moose, for reasons that have been lost to time). Pictured in background: a great deal of Klondike bars, as this selfie was taken at the frozen novelties aisle
...Read More
Monday Link Roundup!
Ancient Grains, The Internet
Nov 04, 2013
Roxane Gay:
What happened is still a true story, one that is indicative of the pervasiveness of racism, and how no part of your life is ever truly free from it. Privilege only reaches so far. I suppose I am grateful, in a twisted way, that this ...Read More
Male Novelist Jokes
Ancient Grains, Humor
Nov 04, 2013
Inspired in no small part by Friend of the Toast Emily Gould.
Q: How many male novelists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: The terrible sex had made him feel deeply interesting, like a murder victim.
Q: How many male novelists does it take to screw in a
...Read More
Gal Science: Mansplaining Physics
Ancient Grains, science
Nov 04, 2013
As The Toast searches for its one true Gal Scientist, we will be running a ton of wonderful one-off pieces by female scientists of all shapes and sizes and fields and education levels, which we are sure you will enjoy. They’ll live here, so you can always find them. Most
...Read More
Further Texts From William Carlos Williams
Ancient Grains, Texts From
Nov 04, 2013
Previously: Texts From William Carlos Williams.
this is just to say
i have eaten
the plums
that were in
the icebox
but when i opened it again later
the plums were back
as if they had never left
only this time
they were
glowing slightly
...Read More
Getting An Abortion in Texas
Ancient Grains, Politics
Nov 04, 2013
It was January 29, 2013 at 11 p.m. when the pain started. A dull throbbing ache in my left lower abdomen that could have been indigestion or cramping. It was uncomfortable, but not unbearable, and I thought the best thing to do was go to sleep. I had flown into Austin the
...Read More